Are Gays The Most Prejudice Group In America?
I've been a fighter since I can remember. I've had to be one. You don't make it through my life's experiences with some sort of normality with out being a fighter, and even though I've been in over a dozen fist fights, with three times as many guys, physical fighting is not the type of fighting I'm talking about. I've always been the guy who stood up for, or who protected those who couldn't protect themselves. You can ask anyone who's known me for years that this is the case. Whether i was called Pooh Bear, Floyd, Hadden or Justice I've always been on the side of the underdog. [if you're curious about all the names check this out!] The battle for glbtq rights is not different; but I'm starting to think I'm on the wrong side of this fight.
I am finding it harder and harder to fight for gay rights in this country, when gays continue to show their colors as the most prejudice and bigoted group in America. Granted theres are all kinds of groups out there that hate gays, but gays are the only groups that they hate. They're fine with women, racial minorities, even other religions. Gays on the other hand, don't seem to like anyone. As a gay, black man, I am finding it harder and harder to fight against prejudice inside a group that subjects almost all of its members to internal prejudice.
How can I continue to fight for a group of people who themselves propagate the bigotry that keeps them oppressed? I swear, if I hear one more gay male talk about masculine or feminine I am going to walk up and punch someone in the face. If I'm not going to let some crazy bigot from a hate-filled church in Kansas define for me what is the proper behavior of a man, then why am I going to let some homosexual do it to me? Someone please tell me what the hell, "be a man" means? If we're talking about physical differences like speed and strength, then we have to throw that term out the door. Since women have been allowed to compete at the highest levels of athletics, the gap between the world's elite men and women has been steadily decreasing over time. Today the world's fastest women are faster than 90% of the male population on the earth.
Well maybe a man acts a certain way, or dresses a certain way, or behaves a certain way? All of that mess is gender discrimination. You see, we have been conditioned to believe that men are supposed to act one way, and women are supposed to act another way. Now do you think our male-dominated society is going to give all the good traits to the males or to the women? So to continue to buy into this notion that how you dress, or your mannerisms have anything to do with masculinity or femininity is to bind the shackle around your own ankle.
I know certain gays who don't like "twinks" or "fem boys", or "bears" or the "str8 acting" (whatever the hell that means), or Blacks, or Asians, or Whites. Gays hide so much prejudice inside a tiny little word that they use to throw people off their bigoted scent, and the word is preference. I prefer guys under 30. I prefer Latin guys. I prefer men who act like men. These are all bigoted statements and they really don't hide your prejudice at all. I live in Seattle, one of the most diverse communities in the country, and one with one of the highest gay populations as well. I am very proud of the fact that I hang out with a wide variety of people on a regular basis. From straight to gay, black, white, asian, latin, native, male and female. Tranny's and jocks, big, small, tall, and um.. long. I wonder in a community like the homosexual community how there can be groups of people who only hang out with their kind. Mainstream America, yes, we want you to accept us and treat us like we aren't different when to you we really may seem different, but in our own community we can't reach across any kind of demographic and support one another.
I have a little secret for the gays. If you want equal rights in this country, you're going to have to have the support of the racial minorities in this country, and namely the African Americans and the Hispanic Americans. Don't believe me? Talk to California about prop 8. There have been recent studies that show that people are generally more prejudice against homosexual males than they are of racial minorities. The difference, is that it is still acceptable to hold that prejudice against gays. Until blacks, who own the rights to oppression in the US, step up and say that yes, discrimination of homosexuals is the same as discrimination against blacks, I don't see a lot of movement towards gay rights. It's gonna take those of us "double dippers" to stand up and say, I have experienced both racial and gender /sexual orientation discrimination, and they both feel and are the same.
But what is our motivation for doing this? Why would I continue to stand up for a community that continues to be so discriminatory to its own kind? So that I can get married? There are very few rights that are lost as a result of not being able to marry that I cannot get back with a couple of corporations and some notarized documents. If you're interested in learning more about using corporations and legal documents to ensue your rights then please email me Justice@JReignConsulting.com
I don't know what the tone of this blog sounded like to you all reading it? Maybe I sound a little bit frustrated. Maybe under your breath you are thinking that I'm bitter cause I can't find a date? Well that's partially true. I'm not a dater. I don't see the point in it, and my friends and I, and all the people around us are too diverse and varied to have someone who isn't accepting of a wide range of people. Unfortunately, I have found that very few gay men are. I will say that in my experience, straight men are much more open to a variety of people and tend to find common ground much easier than their homosexual counterparts.
I'm going to try and end this with some sort of solution, cause other wise i'm only adding to the problem. Gays, if we want mainstream America to accept us and give up their prejudices of us, then we have to lead the way be doing the same for ourselves. We all have prejudices that we may or may not know about. We have to become aware of them, and stop excusing them. If you're prejudice against a group of people, seek them out. Speak with them, and get to know them. Open yourself to becoming aware of your similarities with each other. Your common ground of humanity. There are a finite number of emotions that humans feel, so chances are you all feel the same way. Maybe not about the same things, but in actively doing your part to know and understand and see the connection you open yourselves up to see that despite all our differences, we are all the same. Isn't that how we want America to interact with us? Then shouldn't we lead the way and start dealing with ourselves in that manner?
Posted by Justice Calo Reign at Thursday, September 24, 2009 3:20 AM 
Categories: Equality,Politics,glbtq,Love,Relationships,Critical Thinking,Protests,LGBTQ
Tags: GLBT Authenticity Equality
Categories: Equality,Politics,glbtq,Love,Relationships,Critical Thinking,Protests,LGBTQ
Tags: GLBT Authenticity Equality
Initial thoughts from a straight white guy - I think predjudice is a possible response from anyone who feels 1) threatened and 2) privileged. There are several groups you and I don't share and I've generally found myself in the majority grouping (whatever that means), but from that perspective I wonder this: does the unity that comes from fighting for acceptance from the "majority" turn to in-fighting at some point along the acceptance scale, possibly because group identity and fighting for acceptance has been the norm for so long? Just by placing lables on a group we judge and separate them (e.g. light-skinned, Methodist, biker). If you feel the tendency/privilege to judge yourself as different than another group and are also threatened by them in some way (e.g. they give your shared group a bad name) you'll tend towards predjudice. The trick is to look for the similarities, not the differences.
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I learn every time I read some of your thoughts. A difficult time for you trying to find peace.
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Thank you for commenting! I don't know of too many things that are worth while that don't have some form of difficulty involved with them.
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Very well said. We are ALL individually different, "Fearfully and wonderfully made". No two finger prints are alike, so if we accept the fact we are all different from birth, from there we can look for similarities. How can we just be loving people towards one another? If we're honest, we've all been victims of prejudiceness. The fact we endure to move beyond it, is a testament of our willingness and desire to take the attention off of ourselves and ask, 'how can I be a blessing to someone other than myself today'.
Tiff
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Thank you for commenting on the blog!
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I think alot of people within the gay community feel the way you do. My partner is one of them. My opinion is that change cannot occur if all the good people simply throw up their hands and walk away in frustration. The gay community is so diverse we need all the good vibes we can get! Great post!
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Fortunately I think this is the time when our community is responding to change... All across the board. Thanks for the reply! I'll check out your blog too!
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